ADHD

So. Took Drake to his doctor appt this morning. He was diagnosed with ADHD. He was put on 5mg of Focalin a day. I gave him some around 230pm and he did pretty well on it today. Coming off of it though....another story. WOW! Irritable and just emotional from end to end. Luckily for us, it was bedtime.

Here's where I fail.I get a big fat F in parenting. I know it's hereditary. I know this well. I just cannot process that I have busted my ass to keep him well adjusted in hopes of keeping him a happy kiddo. But regardless if this was in mycontrol or not, I cant help but feel like a failure.
I called Gary afterwards...He's known of this appt since I made it about a month ago. He hit ignore....Ididnt leave a msg. He didnt even call me back to ask me what was up. I rarely call him. And it seems lately, i've had to call just to make sure he was picking Drake up from school. He seems as if Drake isnt such a priority. Maybe it's been this way all along and maybe i'm finally realizing this? Maybe it's b/c I have went out of my way to keep Drake and Gary's relationship together that now that I dont put the effort out b/c it's not really my place too, he just doesnt care?
I dont know. I'm lost. I'm standing here at a crossroads, confused as hell. And maybe it's all the other stressors in my life that are going on surrounding us....maybe just maybe that's why. We'll never know.Iknow that every storm that has crossed our paths, we make it through even stronger than the last one before.

I love my little boy more than anything else in this world. He andI have been through a lot. We'll get through this. But I need help. Well, I feel as if I need help, when in reality do I?

Only time will tell.